The following piece is meant for a laugh. DO NOT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY because I am not. Here are some interesting things that could be done to protest the NHL and some of its policies this season. The serious things will be in parenthesis.
For its lack of respect toward women, female hockey fans could wave their bras around at various arenas either before or during hockey games for the first week of the season. Not only could this put fans in the seats but it could amusingly distract hockey players from doing what they are supposed to be doing. (ED. Note: Courtney Beckham from Chicks Who Give A Puck has made a ton of progress on this issue).
In honor of Gary Bettman screwing the New Jersey Devils yet again, because he loves to throw close allies under the bus whenever we can. I propose the following. Devil players should take out as many opposition as humanly possible during the preseason to send a message to the NHL. (ED. Note: This will not happen as the Devils have more class than that but they are angry people I assure you).
Eric Belanger has a deal in wait for 30 teams. Yes Belanger rumors have surfaced for the past few days. There have been teans in the NHL eliminated but it seems several teams in the KHL, SEL, and DEL are interested. (ED. Note: The deal in waiting is actually for the Capitals surprsingly enough…thank James Mirtle.).
Wade Redden’s career was laid to rest yesterday in a somber ceremony in New York City near Madison Square Garden. There were no dignitaries there. The funerals for Michael Roszival and Chris Drury could only be confirmed by Eklund and we all know where that winds up going. (ED. Note: Redden’s career was pretty much dead after Game 7 of the 2003 Eastern Conf. Finals).
William Shatner is willing to help out Florida Panthers fans by bringing back his not so successful game show back to the South Florida market. His Deal Or No Deal interpretation had far more scantily clad women and was more difficult in the sense you had to gamble on how much you wanted to bet on each question. How does this help Panthers fans? Think of a South Beach version of this with a BBQ. There is potential. (ED. Note: We nearly got in hot water with this idea…wait….we did. Much apologies.)
Ilya Kovalchuk will sign a deal to play hockey in Bangladesh or Tibet. It was then realized that both basically mean the same thing but the KHL or NHL would not offer Ilya enough momey, according to Jay Grossman. Ilya seemed fascinated by the currency as well and could be seen training in the mountains already. (ED. Note: Kovalchuk does not have any such contract offer and is still believed to be signing in New Jersey. Stay tuned.)
The Kings Camp For Kids is going on this week and it is indeed an excellent venture. However, how about a mascot’s camp where NHL and minor league mascots can battle to see who has the most talent on the ice. The winner could win a free tryout with their team. Usually these mascots have to have some skating talent anyway. Also, I heard some teams really need bodies anyway in the worst way. (ED. Note: Sadly this has not been tried nor will it be. Also yours truly has been admonished for stepping on the foot of the Devils’ mascot again).
Fantasy Hockey fans have been kicked in the privates for far too long. It is about time to take action. It is time to petition Uncle Gary to play in a fantasy league to see if he can really manipulate players in the fantasy world like he does in the real world. (Ed. Note: For the record, Gary Bettman apparently does play in some leagues and I am sure Down Goes Brown is on this!).
Not every blogger is going fellatio for Steve Yzerman. One of my favorite posts over the last week was from Blades Of Funny. Apparently to borrow the following and have some fun with this….here goes….
(Instead of LeBron, this billboard could be used as the following………..)
“Welcome Glen Sather. How does it feel to be a pariah to the entire NY Rangers fanbase? Go HOME!” (Ed. Note: Again James Dolan will not fire Sather as he has phots or spy-tech.)
Finally, The Mighty Ducks will be back for ONE NIGHT ONLY. Tonight at 8pm ET, you get to see Rupp-a-mania run wild all over them. Guys like Oates, Giguere, Carney, Sykora, Rob Niedermayer, etc…etc….getting absolutely run to the ditch by a guy who could barely crack the fourth line. (Ed. Note: Game 7 heroes are often unexpected and we apologize for everyone offended except Giguere. He still gets booed).
Now there is only one way to leave this post and that is with the following……
Have a great day and do not forget the smiley face damnit!!!!
